Thankful

Thanksgiving is in just 2 days.   It has snuck right up on us.
I'm not going to lie, this year I have had a hard time being grateful.  I've only been letting myself see the "bad" in our lives rather than focusing on the "good" that surrounds us.  Because of this, I really haven't let myself be truly happy.  It's much easier to wallow in self pity and feel sorry for myself over all that we don't have.  Yesterday for FHE my amazingly wonderfully awesome husband suggested that we finally sit and write a few things we are thankful for on our thankful tree.  Then he pulled up President Uchtdorf's talk from the October General Conference, "Of Regrets and Resolutions."  It is an amazing talk!  

Here are some of my favorite parts.....

"So often we get caught up in the illusion that there is something just beyond our reach that would bring us happiness: a better family situation, a better financial situation, or the end of a challenging trial.

The older we get, the more we look back and realize that external circumstances don’t really matter or determine our happiness.

We do matter. We determine our happiness.

You and I are ultimately in charge of our own happiness."

"My wife, Harriet, and I love riding our bicycles. It is wonderful to get out and enjoy the beauties of nature. We have certain routes we like to bike, but we don’t pay too much attention to how far we go or how fast we travel in comparison with other riders.

However, occasionally I think we should be a bit more competitive. I even think we could get a better time or ride at a higher speed if only we pushed ourselves a little more. And then sometimes I even make the big mistake of mentioning this idea to my wonderful wife.

Her typical reaction to my suggestions of this nature is always very kind, very clear, and very direct. She smiles and says, “Dieter, it’s not a race; it’s a journey. Enjoy the moment.”

How right she is!

Sometimes in life we become so focused on the finish line that we fail to find joy in the journey."

"Brothers and sisters, no matter our circumstances, no matter our challenges or trials, there is something in each day to embrace and cherish. There is something in each day that can bring gratitude and joy if only we will see and appreciate it."

"Perhaps we should be looking less with our eyes and more with our hearts. I love the quote: “One sees clearly only with the heart. Anything essential is invisible to the eyes.”

We are commanded “to give thanks in all things.” So isn’t it better to see with our eyes and hearts even the small things we can be thankful for, rather than magnifying the negative in our current condition?"

Really...Dillon and I have so much to be thankful for despite the "bad" or "not ideal" situations we find ourselves in at this stage of our life together.  I may want some things to change (school to be over, more financial stability and to have a family) but I can and I will be happy with where we are in this moment.   
"It's not a race, it's a journey.  Enjoy the moment."

So, some of the things I am thankful for this Thanksgiving season:

-Dillon.  His love for me.  His patience with me.  His hard work and the sacrifices he makes everyday in order to get a good education.

-My job.  I LOVE working in preschool and I LOVE working with the preschoolers with special needs and VERY special spirits.  Yesterday our little deaf girl signed "I. Love. You." to me; I am thankful for that moment.

-The house we live in.  The location.  The rent.  The space.  The warmth.

-My family and Dillon's family.  The love and support they show us.  The fun that we have together.

-Skeeter. :) He loves me no matter what and he's right there waiting with tail wagging when I need someone to hug and love on when I'm feeling down on life.

-Modern medicine.  Doctors that care and educate themselves  in order to help us that need it.

-The gospel.  The peace, the love, the comfort it provides me in my life.

-My health and my life.

Today I got a phone call that reminded me just how fragile life can be.  Sometimes I forget and I hate the things that have to remind me.
I am blessed.  I am SO lucky to live the life I live.  It's not always perfect and it's not always fun.  But it is my life and the memories I make and the lessons I learn are worth every hard time and every heartache.